Interesting reporting has emerged concerning the sightings of the former president holding court with small gatherings in the middle of his golf courses.  As luck would have it, a casual duffer who was searching for a golf ball he sliced into the rough on the 3rd hole of Trump’s Bedminister Golf Course happened upon one of those secretive conventions very recently. Out of safety concerns for him and his family, he agreed to reveal what he overheard only on the condition of anonymity.

There is pertinent background for this reporting.  This particular closed meeting took place the day after Fox News host Sean Hannity aired his broadcast  that scrolled through the impressive list of probes and litigation former President Trump is facing. Just Another Day at the Office

Recognized in the brush besides Mr. Trump were Mr. Hannity, Rudy Giuliani, and former Trump senior advisor Stephen Miller.  The informant said there were 2 or 3 other people there whom he could not identify.  Mr. Trump seemed to be very anxious about the crimes that had been so publicly  exposed by Mr. Hannity.  Specifically, since it is well known that for some reason the more crime stuff Trump commits, the more sympathy he generates from his admirerers, what Mr. Trump seemed to be demanding from the group were ideas for more crimes he could do that would keep the pity ball rolling.

Things he might consider along the lines of fraud, treason, criminal obstruction and conspiracy were discussed, but Mr. Trump thought those were worn and wanted suggestions for something fresh  he could feel persecuted about.  Though Trump’s sexual assault entaglements are legend, Mr. Giuliani thought resurrecting the “Huffington Post” article might work since it involved a minor. Huffpost  But Mr. Hannity would not get onboard with that idea, saying it was a bit over the top, even for his newscast.

Mr. Hannithy thought arson or bank robbery should be given consideration, but after a point those topics only began to impede delibration.  The group seemed about to give up on finding an appropriate solution when Mr. Giuliani happened to remind everyone about  Mr. Trump’s classic comment about being able to shoot someone on 5th Avenue.  Mr. Miller suddenly interjected that was it. Resolution was staring them in the face all along. His thought was Mr. Trump could easily shoot a wandering migrant that no one would miss and that would not only elicit sympathy for the former president, but gratitude as well.  Mr. Giuliani suggested a better idea might be to shoot one of his personal enemies and kill two birds with one stone so to speak.  He was sure those intensly attatched to MEGAland would be very understanding if Mr. Trump shot Liz Cheney or General Mark Milley.  All agreed the compassion created by justifiable murder would generate overwhelming sympathy for Mr. Trump, and Mr Hannity said that would be the perfect capstone to cement onto his next scrolling list of Trump grievences.

Mr. Trump appeared energized and thanked the group for their input.  Mr. Miller indicated he would be in touch with everyone attending about plan implementation.  Speaking directly to Mr. Trump, Mr. Hannity made the comment that anyone of them would be willing to take a bullet for him.  Right before the group broke up and headed out of the woods, in at an attempt at injecting humor Mr. Hannity asked Mr. Giuliani if he would be willing to be on the receiving end of a Trump bullet.  After pausing for a bit, Mr. Giuliani replied that that would depend on how the impending billion dollar lawsuit being leveled agaist him by Dominion went.  No one laughed.

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After alerting the nation to heretofore unknown governmental storage problems The Emperor’s Emporium    Florida Senator Marco Rubio stated today that he strongly supports storing classified documents in public libraries to aleviate the situation.  Rubio mentioned he got the idea from the Trump legal team.  “When I heard his attorney liken those ten thousand pages of documents that were being stored in every crack and crevice at Mar a Lago to an overdue library book, it dawned on me that public libraries are the perfect solution  to Washington’s overburdned storage system,” Rubio stated.

When asked if his proposal was even feasable with all the extra security that would have to be implemented, Rubio seemed unconcerned.  Reiterating his previous statement that storing top secret documents at a beach resort is no big deal, Rubio went on to say that libraries are already accomplished when it comes to storing printed matter, and  librarians could be brought up to speed in no time.  He did mention that he doesn’t personally know any city librarians, but said one of his chlldren once went to their local library and had a very pleasent experience with Ms. Munger, the head librarian.

In a phone call with  Ms. Munger (pictured) she said she didn’t see a problem storing the nuclear secrets of various nation states, but she seemed fearful the presence of printed details of the sexual escapades of foreign leaders on her shelves would likely ruffle the feathers of many Florida parents and create chaos at local school board meetings.