I hate complainers.  Especially if that’s all they do.  The constant cynicism- who needs it?  Take my neighbor.  He’s always complaining.  He has craftily categorized his personal use of the English language into complaint folders with titles and tabs.  For instance, he has a favorite complaint for each of the four seasons.  Spring will bring a shower of complaints about the pollen count and the unthoughtful behavior of his Kentucky bluegrass that he says he has to mow every five days.  And that complaint involves a lie because he’s lucky to accomplish that in double that time.  You know its summer when every conversation you have with him starts off with complaints about the heat and humidity.  The real head-scratcher occurs in the fall.  Somehow he expects me to keep all the leaves of my trees from blowing into his yard.  I’ve come to appreciate winter.  That’s because that’s the time of year my neighbor more or less hibernates.  For the most part I only run into him if we are both involved in snow removal at the same time.  I consider myself to be  careful and alert to danger, so I have become pretty good at avoiding that scenario.

All the grumbling wears me out.  The thing of it is though, it’s affected my own attitude.  Just look through the previous paragraph.  I am starting to become a complainer!  It’s not just complaints about my neighbor.  Cynicism is creeping into my daily life.  If you had a peek at my “About” tabs, you will notice a couple of things.  First, I am retired, and second, I profess to be a non-complainer, or at least have generally  limited my complaints to the froth of corporate conduct.  But it seems with my retirement I have more time to think about stuff, the kind of stuff that bothers me.  So I’ve started complaining more, like about my neighbor.  And it’s gotten out of hand.  Take the NFL playoff game this year between Green Bay and Seattle.  There is no way the Packers should have lost that game.  Something fishy went on there.  Maybe that ball Seattle used for the on-side kick was under-inflated.  Looking back now, it seems only logical to assume that.  As long as the NFL is scrutinizing the Patriots, why not throw the Seahawks into the mix.  Deep down I suspect Divine Intervention was to blame for that Packer fiasco.  Even with some Seattle shenanigans going on, there’s no way the Packers could look that hapless.  And one thing about me, I like to take my complaints straight to the top.  (See photo below)

You’re probably thinking this reaction is a little over the top.  I’m starting to realize that too.  That’s why I decided to turn over a new leaf.  I am going to get this complaining thing under control once and for all.  Well, maybe not quite once and for all, but I am no longer going to complain just to complain.  Any complaint I have will be constructively contextualized.  And there is a psychological tool I think I can use to help me stay focused.  I got so bogged down in my complaining during this short time I almost forgot about it.  Ask yourself this question: “What are two of the most important things I can do to reduce negativity?”  The two that come to my mind are “thinking happy thoughts'” and “staying relaxed.”

One of the best ways to think happy thoughts is to recollect fond memories.  When I want to tackle that, I start looking at old photographs.  I think this would work well for you also, and for everyone, really.  Take a look at this second photo of me that follows.  See how totally relaxed I am?  Totally.  And talk about happy!  I guess you can’t quite make that out, but believe me I was extremely happy.  This was right after the Packers beat the Cowboys in the playoffs.  Might have been during the game.  I don’t properly recollect.  Anyway, this is my “go-to” prop to help me stay focused.  This is me, in my perfect “non-complain mode.”  If I apply myself and keep recalling the steps I took to get to this level of relaxation, I am very confident you won’t be hearing much in the way of complaining from me.  If you care to, you can share your preferred method of relaxation.